Tuesday, April 14, 2015

18 Struggles of Having a Quiet ENFP Personality

The other day, I came across an article on 18 Struggles Of Having An Outgoing Personality But Actually Being Shy And Introverted. Reading it, I realized that almost the exact opposite of everything the author said applied to me. So, I decided to make my own list.
I’ve always thought I was a shy person, but as I got older, I realized I wasn’t. I love talking to people and meeting new people. Then, I took the Myers-Briggs test and every single time came out with an ENFP result. The only thing is most ENFPs seem a lot “louder” than I am. Therefore, I’ve titled this list 18 Struggles of Having a Quiet ENFP Personality. I used the points from the above mentioned article as a starting point and went from there. I left points 12 and 15 basically the same because they apply - just in the opposite way from what the author of the original page meant.

Now, without further ado:

18 Struggles of Having a Quiet ENFP Personality


  1. You love listening to people talk. Seriously, you could listen to them all day. Yeah, you have opinions, advice, and stories on what they say and you may voice them if you feel like you’ll be well received, but you don’t HAVE to say anything.

  1. You feel like everyone has the potential to be a great friend - but you worry you might come off as too needy/clingy if you talk/text/ask to hang out with them too much.

  1. Regardless of the reason, a party is a party! And you get to see people!

  1. You enjoy the anticipation of a night out almost as much if not more than the actual night out.

  1. You then have the almost-as-enjoyable pleasure of reliving the night out over and over until the next fun event arises.

  1. You go out of your way to let people know how much you love and appreciate them for just existing.

  1. Relationships are weird because when you’re with someone, you are totally with them. But if, while y’all are apart, they don’t contact you, you wonder if they really don’t like you and you’re just putting your eagerness to have a great relationship on them, when that’s not really what they want.

  1. You’re often accused of being flirty when you’re really just being friendly.

  1. You don’t really use social media as a way to express yourself, you prefer a real conversation (but you love to read about other people’s lives).

  1. Social media does come in handy when you want people to come read your latest blog post or a really cool article you found (and debated for two hours whether or not to share).

  1. In social situations, you vacillate between letting your outgoing side express itself and sticking to the status quo.

  1. You’ve never really understood the whole “introvert vs. extrovert” dichotomy, because you’re… both… (And, the whole “ambivert” thing just annoys you to no end.)

  1. When it comes down to it, as long as the rest of the group is okay with it, you like stepping up and being the one to present or give the speech (after you get over the initial shock of breaking out of your “quiet” shell).

  1. Being noticed and praised for hard work makes you feel so fulfilled and successful, until you realize you have absolutely no clue how to respond to the notice and praise.

  1. The entirety of your being is a conundrum; so needless to say, indecisiveness is your Achilles’ Heel.

  1. You’re at your happiest in places like coffee shops and caf├ęs: surrounded by people, able to watch and listen to them and imagine what it’s like to be them, where they’re going, what they’re doing, and how they would respond if you walked up to them and told them what you know about them just from observation. Then, you realize that you sound like a total stalker and go back to your book.

  1. You LOVE to travel. Alone or with others doesn’t matter as long as you can have/hear good conversations.

  1. It’s taken you years to figure out that you’re actually an extrovert. And when you tell people that you’re “actually an extrovert” they inevitably say, “But you’re so quiet!”


I totally love it this way and wouldn’t have it any other way. I’m so glad God made me the kind of person He did! :)


~ToriLynn